Here I am working from home after a long weekend well spent at the Lake Superior,
when from nowhere I get the urge to write something.
I have a very close group of friends with whom I've grown up. We've mostly known each other from kindergarten and have always been in touch. Since there is around 25 years of history, the comfort levels in the group is also very high. The advent of WhatsApp and the likes helps keep us connected very easily. So here we were, ten friends having a WhatsApp group and discussing everything and anything under the sun - from the minute stupid jokes that we still say to opinions on worldly matters that are of far more significant importance.
So, one of the discussions that we recently had was - how much each of us has changed? Some were of the opinions that we have changed close to zilch! Some were of the opinions that we have changed so much that we are mere shadows of our past self. I felt it was a very interesting discussion. I believe a good part of what you are takes shape during the formative years where in your heart and head gets set in whatever way is best suited to you. But that does not mean you stop growing past that stage. Growing is the word I would like to emphasize on here. Depending on the experiences you have in life, you learn new things and unlearn old ones. To what extent each of these experiences changes a person, I do not know. It varies depending on the person you are.
Personally, I feel a lot of positive vibes when I travel with my awesome travel mate - my wife Dakshina. We both fall under the same criteria I mentioned earlier. Our acquaintance dates back to our kindergarten days! Both of us love to travel. We feel that each and every one of these experiences enriches us. It is a wonderful feeling - when you travel, meet people, see stuff, gain new experiences - that you see how each and every thing can be viewed so differently by two people. It feels so good to discuss all these things over dinner and still awe at some of the small stuff that you noticed on that day!
So if you ask me the question, do you think you have changed since 10-15 years back, I would definitely answer - Yes. But my point here would be that you are just a better version of what you were. You have had time to think and straighten out some flaws.. You have had time to experience new feelings, emotions, sights that you were not privy to earlier. You have had time to be the person you wanted to be. All of these statements need not be true for everyone. I do not believe I have achieved what I want to achieve in my life. A discussion I had recently comes to mind. The person mentioned that if you have a general idea what you want to do with your life, you should either be doing it, or do things that will lead you to doing it in the future. That struck me as a very pertinent point. Here I am, travelling a decent amount, doing a pretty good job at work, having found the life companion I have always wanted and still not sure as to where I want my life to lead to. Currently I am just letting it flow with the tide. I am unclear as to what defines me as a person. Is it the job I do? Or is the stuff I do at the times I am not working? Or should the job just be the means (financial ability) to do the things that I want to do otherwise? Is it too much to ask for both? Or is it just how I conduct myself in general? I have far too many questions than answers!
Well.. Before I get another tangential thought in my head let me make the point I set out to make. The set of friends that I made during my school days remain very special to me. During our discussions, we have had so much of difference in opinions.. so many arguments, we tease each other so bad that it might even seem offensive to a third party.. but the very next day, we are back to being the kids from kindergarten. I enjoy and respect that. I wish and hope with all my might that that NEVER CHANGES!
I have a very close group of friends with whom I've grown up. We've mostly known each other from kindergarten and have always been in touch. Since there is around 25 years of history, the comfort levels in the group is also very high. The advent of WhatsApp and the likes helps keep us connected very easily. So here we were, ten friends having a WhatsApp group and discussing everything and anything under the sun - from the minute stupid jokes that we still say to opinions on worldly matters that are of far more significant importance.
So, one of the discussions that we recently had was - how much each of us has changed? Some were of the opinions that we have changed close to zilch! Some were of the opinions that we have changed so much that we are mere shadows of our past self. I felt it was a very interesting discussion. I believe a good part of what you are takes shape during the formative years where in your heart and head gets set in whatever way is best suited to you. But that does not mean you stop growing past that stage. Growing is the word I would like to emphasize on here. Depending on the experiences you have in life, you learn new things and unlearn old ones. To what extent each of these experiences changes a person, I do not know. It varies depending on the person you are.
Personally, I feel a lot of positive vibes when I travel with my awesome travel mate - my wife Dakshina. We both fall under the same criteria I mentioned earlier. Our acquaintance dates back to our kindergarten days! Both of us love to travel. We feel that each and every one of these experiences enriches us. It is a wonderful feeling - when you travel, meet people, see stuff, gain new experiences - that you see how each and every thing can be viewed so differently by two people. It feels so good to discuss all these things over dinner and still awe at some of the small stuff that you noticed on that day!
So if you ask me the question, do you think you have changed since 10-15 years back, I would definitely answer - Yes. But my point here would be that you are just a better version of what you were. You have had time to think and straighten out some flaws.. You have had time to experience new feelings, emotions, sights that you were not privy to earlier. You have had time to be the person you wanted to be. All of these statements need not be true for everyone. I do not believe I have achieved what I want to achieve in my life. A discussion I had recently comes to mind. The person mentioned that if you have a general idea what you want to do with your life, you should either be doing it, or do things that will lead you to doing it in the future. That struck me as a very pertinent point. Here I am, travelling a decent amount, doing a pretty good job at work, having found the life companion I have always wanted and still not sure as to where I want my life to lead to. Currently I am just letting it flow with the tide. I am unclear as to what defines me as a person. Is it the job I do? Or is the stuff I do at the times I am not working? Or should the job just be the means (financial ability) to do the things that I want to do otherwise? Is it too much to ask for both? Or is it just how I conduct myself in general? I have far too many questions than answers!
Well.. Before I get another tangential thought in my head let me make the point I set out to make. The set of friends that I made during my school days remain very special to me. During our discussions, we have had so much of difference in opinions.. so many arguments, we tease each other so bad that it might even seem offensive to a third party.. but the very next day, we are back to being the kids from kindergarten. I enjoy and respect that. I wish and hope with all my might that that NEVER CHANGES!
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